Hi Sir, I am Kiran, I belong from middle class family. I and my wife had a small debate in the morning regarding the breakfast which she made. After I went to office my wife went to her parents’ home without informing my parents, since my parents were out of station that day. So she messaged me on my mobile and she left from my home, saying that she is leaving forever, she emotionally blackmailed me, answer me or I will do this. May be she might be waiting for the situation to leave from my home, and utilize the situation. Very honestly I am saying, I or my mom or my dad never scolded nor beaten her anytime. But we use to get angry when she didn’t cook well or didn’t work properly. Moreover she won’t keep any interest while doing any work at home, she is irresponsible, she won’t respond properly when we speak to her. And her parents are too irresponsible, we informed them that she left home like this and came to your home. We were very tensed that day, but we can’t see same tension in her or them. And they did not even call us and spoke after a day or later she went off. Top of this she is 2 months pregnant, and she have a health problem, where she should not travel anywhere for at least 3 or 5 months. And she didn’t care about it and she travelled to her home. And in 2nd month scanning it has been confirmed that baby has died again, hence this miscarriage of pregnancy had happen 2nd time with her. She didn’t care of baby in her stomach and she traveled, so that’s why I got angry and I haven’t called her, but my mother tried calling her but she did not respond. Later after a week, when they came to know that she miscarried the baby again, then that day her father called my father and spoken politely first, then my father said ok bring her here and will show here in hospital, and also told get elders to speak about this issue once, because we don’t want to face such issues in future. Then her father all of sudden shouted on my father on phone and without informing us, next day they brought 5 men along with her brother to my home and shouted on my parents. That time I was in office. So my parents finally told them come when my son is there, so that he will tell you everything clearly. Simply by shouting, the issue will not solve. But even though, my wife and her parents are talking like then don’t want to continue the relationship and they warned my parents and shouted on them. Even my wife spoke very rudely with my parents. Since my mother and father always took care of her very well, and took her to several hospitals and went to several temples with wish that she should conceive. Since she have hormone issues. But finally she conceived and she behaved irresponsible and lost the baby again. We never even scolded her on this health problem, even though they have behaved in this way. That’s why we are feeling very sad. But I have not called anyone of them and not said anything, because her family members speak stupid on phone and talk something different when they come face to face. I want to talk face to face and tell what they are and their daughter is. But my mom and dad are scared that they may do something stupid and involve me in that. Because in reality lot of sympathy goes to women, if even there is mistake by women. So can you please advise me what I can do in this situation? But truly sir, when that women does not care for my parents or me, then how can I live with her. Top of that her parents don’t respect my parents and speak so stupid with them, and when I question they say we didn’t say that. Please advice.
From perusal of the facts provided by you, it is quite clear that your spouse is in a habit of leaving for her father’s house without informing you or your parents. In such a circumstance, if you want your spouse to cohabit with you the remedy available to you is that of Restitution of Conjugal Rights under the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955. When a person, without the permission of his/her spouse withdraws from the society of the other, the aggrieved party has the right to approach the court for restitution of conjugal rights. If satisfied, the court can pass an order directing the respondent to cohabit with the aggrieved party and perform all the marital duties.
You have also said that your wife does not respect your parents and that under the prevailing circumstances it has become difficult for you to cohabit with her. In this case, you have two remedies available to you. They are:-
1) Judicial Separation under section 10 of the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955- A judicial separation is a legal way to stay separate from spouse, without obtaining a decree for divorce. In case there is no resumption of cohabitation between the parties for a period of one year or upwards, it shall become a ground for divorce.
2) Divorce – Section 13 of the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955 provides for grounds for divorce.
The grounds for both divorce and judicial separation are the same and in your case you can argue the ground of constant mental cruelty inflicted upon you by your wife.
However, you will have to consider the possibility that your wife can file a case against you under Section 498A of the Indian Penal Code, i.e. Cruelty by husband or relative of husband. Keep in mind that this offence is cognizable (Police can make arrest without warrant) in nature and is non-bailable.
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